Missing Scarlet after losing her one year ago...

It will be one year since our beautiful, beloved Scarlet passed away. It was an agonizing decision but she had lost use of her back legs so quickly (her cute pork chops that I always tenderized while she looked at me with bewilderment in her sweet brown eyes.) Ladybug had a biopsy earlier that day and we had to make the terrible appointment to put Scarlet to sleep. She had stopped eating and Ladybug bravely, and lovingly tried to give her liquids via IV but Scarlet was so out it of by then. Poor, poor mama... I miss her face, her smile, her silliness, the way she rubbed her head on you as a hug. She was THE most amazing creature -so full of love and patience. Here she is waiting for me outside the deli on 95th & Columbus wearing her boot to protect her little paw from the surgery to remove the tumor on her foot.

I miss you so very much my sweet, sweet lady...

My favorite furry Valentine...

Scarlet on Valentine's Day morning, 2012.  It was our tradition when I came home for my birthday, to go to Central Park and say hi to the hippos in the 91st Street playground. Scarlet was always mesmerized by those hippos, and I think she was waiting for them to move.  I miss her sweet, loving, curious spirit. She was a lovely friend and I miss her every.single.day.

Gonna have to start working on my blog again.  So many things have happened just in the past 6 months alone.

The Roots of My Hungarian Tree

I was researching the surnames of my great grandmother Anna and my grandmother Margaret on the internet today. 
My appetite is always alive for information on my Hungarian family.
It is the part of my life that needs the most nourishment.

Today I found the name and email address of someone on the Bergenland Bunch, a website of Hungarians.

His information fit very well into the history of my own family:
The reference of surnames Ifju-Karoly, the places of Allentown and Northampton, PA.

I ventured and sent him an email.

He responded!

It turns out, he is the youngest son of my Uncle Johnnie, a brother of my grandmother!

Looking forward to developing a friendship and learning about my family...

searching for my own lighthouse for inner guidance...

Awakening to a new day, a new life... After 7 years, and a lot of struggles with my own ideals and the declining of my phyiscal health, I am now seeking a place for healing. I contemplated many places but finally realized that the BEST place would be one from my childhood. My mom took us to Ship Bottom, NJ many summers when we were little. We would spend our mornings on the soft sands of the beach, the waves being gentle in the morning hours. The sand not yet hot from the sun. We stayed at The Outrigger Motel, a small property of efficiencies that was owned and run by the Browne Family. It was nestled between the beach and the bay of the barrier island and it was always comfortable and safe for our little family of three. I never really thought how my mom did it. Being a single mom and paying for all that we had. She never seemed to run out of quarters for us at the arcade and we always had food, and fun places to go and eat. The past two summers we've been able to return to this little town on Long Beach Island, NJ. We celebrated two birthdays for mom in a lovely New England-style house by the bay. Cozy enough for shelter during storms, pretty enough to be a treasure to our eyes, a gem or two poking up in every corner of the house to delight us! I have deceide to return to this island after 7 years of living in Dallas and working in a miserable place that often provided conflict to the spirit of who I am, and where I have been. I am hoping I will find peace, serenity and some the strength in my own beliefs and ideals that seemed to dissipate like a wave returning to sea after it has crashed upon a shore...

Birthday Gerbers

Celebrating "ME" with a sprinkle of color...